Good Day

So my wife went out with a friend this morning leaving me and the little one at home for the morning. We played a little, we ran around the house, did some laundry and a couple other things around the house, and laughed a lot. I listened to a radio interview with Lecrae, I listened to Rebel for like the 25th time this week, and then I turned on this Mark Driscoll sermon on marriage that I have been meaning to listen to for awhile. It is a good sermon. He doesn't hold back that is for sure. I like a lot of what Driscoll says I just pray that the Lord would continue to keep his ears open to the older Christian leaders in his life. Stay humble Mark the Lord is using you brother.

Anyway not what I wanted to say. So nice morning with Micah. So Driscoll sermon and wanted to check something on our budget and send an e-mail so I ask Micah to go play a little. Micah goes off and is playing with her kitchen set. After about ten minuets I look up and she is laying on the floor snuggling with her teddy bear. So I watched her for a couple minuets and then she rolled over and looked at me and smiled.

She looked at me and decided to get up and walk over to daddy (that's me) and signaled "Up please." So I picked her up and she started snuggling up with me. So we (Micah, her teddy bear and myself) are sitting on the couch and all of a sudden I see her eyes start to close and all of sudden she is snoring.

I share this just because it was a sweet moment between my daughter and I. As I sit here typing with one hand while my daughter takes a little nap on me, I guess I'm excite for another one next year...
Caleb

Stuff Going On, or should I say going ORRFFF!!!

Well trying to get this back up and running.

Currently Listening to: NoFX, Five Iron, Skankin Pickle, Asian Man Records

Movies Recently Seen:
2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) - Weird
The Great Escape (1963) - Good
Spirited Away (2002) - Already seen it, but still really good
Jackass Number Two (2006) - O.K. when they are hitting each other

Movies I've seen that I liked since I stopped Blogging...
Little Miss Sunshine (2006)
Children of Men (2006)
The Manchurian Candidate (1962)
Rebecca (1940)
Strangers on a Train (1951)
Rear Window (1954)
Munich (2005)

So despite what was a very weird start to the week things are going good. I am continuing to adjust to marriage. It is way harder then I ever thought it would be. I was single for so long that it is hard to kind of relearn, or learn, how to live this close to someone else. It is little things but they add up and it is almost like I need to be on full scale alert for someone else needs, wants, and feelings 100% of the time. But it is getting better...

So I love my Church!!! Seriously it rules!!! John Piper finished up Romans and then he has been doing a series on marriage, perfect timing... Anyway it has been awesome. No skits, no movie clips, no T.V. show clips, non of that crap just straight up, hard hitting marriage stuff. So if you don't go to Bethlehem you should listen to them, hey you can download them for free. Just go to DesiringGod.com and you can experience them.

Once again I just want to say thank you for all your prayers. The peace I feel about my up coming surgery is kind of overwhelming I was so worried for a couple days I just felt like I was going to throw up but God has instilled his peace on me and I am so thankful, thank God He is control and not worried about what will happen.
Godspeed,
Caleb M. Saarela

Life Update #2 Modified

A letter sent to my friends and family...

Well it has been almost 6 weeks since I got the pleasure of marring my beautiful wife. We have adjusted to living together, well almost, we are still learning but we are happy to be leaning. My stuff is moved in and I am trying not to mess things up.

"Where does this dish go? I can dry these pants but not these one's? Why!?!?"

First off we just want to say Thank You so much for being our friends and family and making our wedding so special.

Missy's got herself a regular job that will hopefully turn into a full time, real, teaching job before next school year. I am still a bum...

On a more serious note, as some of you have heard on Tuesday we found out that the mole on my left cheek is cancerous.

It was by far and away one the most surreal moments of my life. To hear a doctor say "you have skin cancer" on a Tuesday afternoon while sitting in the hall of the school was beyond strange. I think I was in shock for the first 24 hours.

I have Basal Cell Carcinoma Sclerosing. Basal Cell Carcinoma is the most common form of skin cancer and is not usually a major problem if treated quickly. Tumors can be removed and don't have any long-term effects. And Sclerosing just means scar like in nature.

But it was still a little scary and took a little time to settle into. There were also a lot of nagging questions that I didn't know the answers to. Some people can lose a nose or an ear if they have tumors on those parts of the body. Is mine too close to my ear or my eye? I have had this mole since high school will the length I have had it, the size it is, be a problem? Would my medical insurance cover this? How much would we have to pay? All that stuff just kept running through my mind. And I can't lie to you I did think about what if this was something worse, something life threatening...

Missy was great she kept me calm and thinking positively, we had some good conversations about how thankful we are that God is in control and although I was shocked, God wasn't. And in the grand scope the small spot on my face is just that, small...

Today we went to see the surgeon who will be performing my Mohs Surgery, and we were able to get all of our questions answered. He was doubtful that there would be any long-term problems and seemed optimistic that the only lasting affect will be a three to four inch scar on my face. Which is fine by me.

We both walked out relieved and feeling like a weight has been lifted. We are not totally out of the woods, but we are feeling like we have a little more light and or on the right path. I have basically felt like throwing up for the last two days, but started feeling better yesterday as I thought, prayed and learned about the characteristics of my cancer.

I will have surgery on March 6th, and because the surgery is done in three or four stages it could take almost all day, and then a day or two to recover.

Anyway I know this is brief but just wanted to let people know what was going on, and to say thank you for your prayers. I know they carried us through these last couple days. So again thank you, we love you, and we will keep you posted on how things go.

Godspeed,
Caleb and Missy

Spring Sure is Exciting

Music: O.K. ready for this, tons of variety... Led Zeppelin, Simon and Garfunckle, Queens of the Stone Age, Foo Fighters, Wallflowers, Probot, Taylor Hawkins and the Coattail Riders, White Stripes, Stavesacre, and "Steady, as She Goes" by The Raconteurs...

Well I have so many things to be excited for this Spring. Baseball starts in like one week and the Twins could be a contender. It kind of depends on if the gambles they took pay off we will see. Go Twinkies!!!

Reason number two to be excited this spring is all the super cool music coming out. Here are probably more but three big ones for me are...

1. Stavesacre:How to Live with a Curse, April 18th. They are one of the coolest Hard Rock bands out there. Their concerts are super intense and they are probably the best band you have never heard of. They have these great lyrics and just this intense sound. I heard someone once call them the Emo version of Tool, which probably annoyed them and I am not a huge fan of people making random comparisons like that but you get the point.

2. The Raconteurs: Broken Boy Soldiers, May 16th. This is a group consisting of Jack White of The White Stripes and Brendan Benson an old friend of Jack's from Detroit and then Jack Lawrence of The Greenhornes and Patrick Keeler also of The Greenhornes. Their first single is called "Steady, as She Goes." You can find it on their web-site which can be a little finicky at times but it is really cool, the song, the web-site is pretty clever. Anyway I'm pretty excited for that album.

3. Less Than Jake: In with the Out Crowd, May 23rd. Their last album Anthem was really good super solid punk-rock-ska album. So I'm pretty excited for their new one. There aren't a whole lot of ska bands that are still around making cool music so I like it when one is still doing their thing.

Also just doing all the stuff getting ready for this summer. I need to find a summer job and try and get into a class or two, time is running out... Yikes, but I am excited to keep on going with the whole nursing thing. I was definitely using this semester as a litmus test. Do I really want to subject myself to endlessly tiring weeks for the purpose of pursuing this career.

And the usual fun things about spring and summer, nice weather, weddings (way to go Andy), Softball starts in like thirty three days, and just a chance to take a break for my school job I'm super excited!!!

Probably the thing I'm most excited for is the worst part of my week...

Godspeed,
Caleb M. Saarela

Times Like These
Dave Grohl

New Year

Happy New Year!!!

I think this is a funny time of year; everyone gets all sentimental and starts questioning their life… But in reality this has been a big year for me and writing this is probably just good for me to look back but probably not that interesting sorry. The spring was pretty quite I guess the biggest thing was the development of my relationship with Justin (the student I work with). I really think it was early this year where he really started to trust me and this was a catalyst to the relationship. The begging of the summer was a little weird. Then this summer I got the chance to go to camp with Justin, it was a long week for him but we made it through and he really started to have fun by the end of the week. Probably the biggest highlight of the week was getting Justin to sleep, he was super nervous and to get him to settle down at night I would sing to him I ended up singing a song from the Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien. It was pretty sweat, it maybe strange but God has blessed me so much through Justin, he is by far the most interesting friend I have and I’m blessed to know him.

Also in the summer I started to help lead the bible study I have been attending for about two years. “Taking over” even just in part was a pretty humbling experience. Jake and Jonathan are these awesome charismatic leaders with extensive biblical knowledge, so in the summer Nathan, Mitch and myself took over most of the responsibilities. It was a pretty big deal Jonathan and me had talked about it before but when it came to it I was pretty scared. Then in the fall as the group multiplied Mitch and myself took on the leading responsibilities, as Nathan really needed to be focused on school. It has been a blessing to have this opportunity to have some shepherding responsibilities with Bethlehem. I am still humbled buy the opportunity to help lead this group. Many of us were apprehensive about the initial split but it has allowed us to go deeper in the two groups that evolved out of the one while also making room for new members. Anyway the multiplication did exactly what it was supposed to.

The end of year was filled with revelations about singleness, family, career goals, theology, and hope for the future. Anyway I’m thankful for 2005 God has used it to refine me and bring more consistency to my spiritual life.

So Happy New Year! Thanks for reading this, for praying for me, for being my friend. May God bless your 2006 and put things in your life that draw you closer to Him.

Godspeed,
Caleb M. Saarela

“This New Years Eve, something must change me inside,
I'm crooked and misguided, and tired of being tired.
This New Years Eve, I'm waiting for tomorrow.
My heart is on my sleeve, and yes I still believe, in You.”
R. Roper

An open letter of update...

Well I know I haven't posted in a while sorry life has been busy and there was some good discussion on the money stuff. Anyway the big news is that I got into the classes I wanted to for the spring so it looks like Caleb is a student again. Thank you to anyone who has been praying for me to get into these classes and also who has prayed for me over the last three years that I would get my life together.
Today as I was walking out of the office with my little piece of paper saying, “I was on my way” I had such and overwhelming sense of God’s faithfulness. How many times had I started to doubt and question what God was doing in my life. Anyway thanks to everyone, especially my family, for sticking with this loser I’ll let you know how things go…
Godspeed,
Caleb M. Saarela

P.S. Those are the same lyrics as before but they just fit so well, sorry I'm lame. I'm working on a little poem it's almost done and then I'll post that soon...

"Fathomless your endless mercy,
weight I could not lift.
Where do I fit in this puzzle,
what good are these gifts?
Not a martyr, or a saint,
scarcely can I struggle through.
All that I have ever wanted,
was to give my best to you.

Lord, search my heart,
create in me something clean.
Dandelions
you see flowers in these weeds.

Gently lifting hands to heaven,
softened by the sweetest hush,
a Father sings over his children,
loving them so very much.
More than words could warrant,
deeper than the darkest blue,
more than sacrifice could merit,
Lord, I give my heart to you."
R. Roper

Life Update

Wow where to begin. I look at the list of people I have invited to check this thing out and there are some people I have not seen in a long time. Anyway my life...

First off I still love Jesus and want to do His work so no backsliding besides the usually inability to sanctify. "Sanctify stupid!!!" And yes I am still relatievly obsessed with Five Iron Frenzy despite their demise two years ago. I cried but have lived on...

Well as many of you know after college I spent two years working in China and that is all I can say about that or I will have to kill you. No that was a good time in my life I learned a ton of things about ministry and about myself. One thing I learned was that at this point in my life I am not called to over sea's mission work. There is always the possibility in the future and in many ways I long to find a way to do some short term stuff and some how stay involved in over seas missions.

So I came home really feeling like I didn't have a clue as to what I wanted to do. So I started doing the whole job search thing. Hooray for that long and annoying process of basically being told over and over again how you're not good enough for anything. It was at this point that I coined the phrase "over educated and under employed." I quickly discovered that I was over qualified for every entry-level position but not qualified enough for any positions that pay above the poverty line.

In the end I found a job working at a middle school in Edina Minnesota. I started working with a guy named Justin. He is an autistic child in the 8th grade (when I started he was in 6th). At first things were really tough I had no idea what I was doing and there was not a lot of training involved so I was just kind of thrown into it. But God has really shown His grace in finding this job. About half way through my fist year something clicked with Justin and we really started getting along great. Ever since then working with him has been an absolute blast we spend most of our time goofing around, walking around school and talking with people.

This summer ('05) we went to camp together for 7 days. It was a pretty intense week but we made it through and it pushed the level of trust in the relationship to a new level. So anyway we have entered our third year together and so far so good.

During my last year in China I read the book Desiring God. The book had a profound effect on me. So upon returning to Minneapolis Bethlehem was on the top of my list for Churches to check out. I went once and that was it I was in love. I had thoughts of checking out other churches but God has really given me a spiritual home at Bethlehem. Early on I got involved in a Bible Study and last summer I actually started leading it with a couple other guys. I also work in the nursery every week which has been a good way to get to know some of the families at Bethlehem which other wise can be kind of tough for a single guy.

Every since my return to Minneapolis what the future holds has been ever on my mind. I have pursued a number of different options but nothing really stuck out, nothing jumped off the page. So I continued on trusting that the Lord was preparing something for me. In the last month God has lead me further in the pursuit of a career then any of the others that have floated across my mind. So in January I am going back to school and going to start working on my prerequisites for some of the different nursing programs in the Twin Cities. Yes that's right I am heavily considering becoming a male nurse -Insert Joke Here-.

I am still not completely sure yet but I think that the (personal) skill set (especially when it comes to working with children) I possess and an ever growing desire to help people with physical needs as well as spiritual ones has lead me here. The science classes will be tough no doubt but I think we will realize if this is the right thing for me about half way through Anatomy and Physiology. I am not sure if I would work her in the states or head over seas but we will see.

Anyway that as true of a life update as need be. Sorry it is so long, I will try keep this updated about me as I go. Thanks for reading...
Godspeed,
Caleb M. Saarela